Boxing
Baby Reindeer: An Interview with John Fury’s Forehead
Halfway through writing an article in which Andy Lee discusses Tyson Fury’s renewed focus, I was distracted by the news that John Fury, Tyson’s dad, used his head – or, as the case may be – on a member of Oleksandr Usyk’s entourage, simply because well, it was Monday.
I then thought about two things: first, whether his father’s antics would affect Fury’s so-called renewed focus; and second, whether the article I was writing was even worth finishing, given this latest attention-grabbing article.
I will never know the answer to the first question, but the answer to the second question was simple to find. You only had to look at John Fury’s reaction to headbutting the Ukrainian in Saudi Arabia to quickly understand why there was no need to write or talk about anything else about the Fury-Usyk fight that day. You see, John Fury did it. He made the day, if not the week, all about him.
As soon as they realized this, fans with cameras in Riyad surrounded him, as if all of life’s answers could be found on John Fury’s forehead, which was oozing blood rather pathetically. “Buddy, buddy, buddy, what happened?” – everyone asked, one by one, lining up like a flock of geese. Meanwhile, Tyson Fury, in his own interview, probably summed up the situation best when he spotted his father and said, “What happened to your head, you stupid cunt?”
Tyson Fury (Nathan Stirk/Getty Images)
No matter how he was prompted, the answer, like the question, was always the same. Something about no man being born from a mother who didn’t go through a Fury (or some variation on that). But what the media failed to get, despite all their desperation to get to the point and be first, was one key piece of information; that is, the nickname John Fury once gave to the forehead, i.e. the weapon that was used yesterday by a member of Oleksandr Usyk’s team.
The name for those who don’t know is: Baby Reindeer.
This is a true story, by the way, although it should be made clear that John Fury’s name has nothing to do with the Netflix series that is currently taking the world by storm and causing countless influence hunters to harass and sometimes interview misfit civilians on television. which some of the characters in the show were apparently based on. Instead, John Fury chose to name his forehead Baby Reindeer simply because it represented the condition he leaves every male born to his mother – briefcases, sausages – once something has been combined with them. In fact, if you think about it, there’s a sturdy possibility that this was what he was trying to explain to the youthful member of Usyk’s entourage as he invaded his space and the world watched as the Little Reindeer’s punch silenced Ukraine. Or maybe, ultimately, John Fury simply wants his story to be heard and wants the world to know that the man from whose testicles Tyson Fury was born has an equally powerful forehead.
In this case, he needs better questions and some change. You see, ask him the same questions and all you’ll hear is the same Sean Dyche growl and the same trite answers; just like putting a man like John Fury in the same situation will only produce the same results. Then again, when it comes to John Fury, maybe that’s the point. Perhaps it is these answers and these results that boxing, struggling under the weight of its own unseriousness, is now seeking a sort of finality or Hail Mary swing.
Regardless, there are currently people in Saudi Arabia who, while traveling, planned to interview Tyson Fury before his huge fight and then spend Monday reporting on what his dad decided to do with his head. Some, very diligently, followed the drama on cameras and phones, which is often the easiest way to document the tragedy these days, while others, real journalists, sat down and devoted words to an event that they knew had no connection with the fight they were fighting for. they traveled, and yet somehow they meant everything in the world in which they now toil. Even then, remember, no one asked the right questions; or in this case, learned the name and history of John Fury’s now celebrated forehead.
Chances are that if John Fury had faced a professional like Piers Morgan on Monday, things would have been different. Unlike those present in Riyad, Morgan would undoubtedly get to the truth and uncover the motives of the world heavyweight champion’s father once and for all. He would give John Fury a platform to speak out and suggest that it is in your best interest to speak to him – there is no time to waste at this point. He would promise an online audience of millions something John Fury had wanted for years, and he would do everything in his power to make him celebrated; really celebrated, not just celebrated in boxing. All the while, John Fury, slowly peeling away the plaster dripping vertically from his forehead, musters the courage to say to Morgan, “Thank you, Piers. Now let me tell you about Little Reindeer.
John Fury goes crazy (Misfits Boxing)
Until now, John Fury was merely trying to shout his way to prominence in the world of boxing. However, as he found out, it wasn’t just his trick and he had to come up with fresh, better ways to attract attention and focus the whole situation on himself. By all accounts, that’s where Baby Reindeer came in; a tool, before Monday, largely forgotten and unused, and yet long-time friend John Fury, who will soon turn 60, was always there to turn to in times of trouble.
Cynics will, of course, suggest that he simply pulled something from his past to gain attention and distract everyone from a much more significant and significant fight. However, it will not be the first time that John Fury will claim that he is misunderstood, attacked and persecuted. He will call himself a “fighting man” and you a “political bastard.”
Meanwhile, his Little Reindeer, initially annoyed at being the center of attention, will later claim self-defense and claim that a mere forehead cannot be held responsible for the decisions made by those who push it forward, whether into the spotlight or in other people’s faces. After recovery, they will consider their options: legal, management, sponsorship. They will start a podcast. They will fight Paul. They will become the second most powerful forehead after Zinedine Zidane and the second most powerful part of John Fury’s anatomy after his testicles. Give him a year or two and Baby Reindeer will even agree to appear in the three-part documentary Fury vs. Usyk for Netflix as a talking head and then the whole world will finally know their name.
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